I used to love holidays. All 40+ of my family in one house? Yes, please. I couldn't hear my own words much less think a single thought without someone chiming in. It was glorious. But the year I was first divorced changed all that. Even though the same people were there (actually probably more because of all the babies being born at every turn), the same volume was present, I couldn't get my mind to STOP. I felt alone in a sea of family. I felt pitied. I felt like I couldn't